Wednesday, June 23, 2004

The Story of Ha and Chew

Chapter 6

The incessant droning of the bus engine greatly irritated Chew and the constant shaking of the bus didn't help much either. He was trying very hard to fall asleep but that, it would seem, would prove to be an increasingly impossible task. Every time he began to fall asleep the lumbering red/white pathetic excuse for human transportation would hit a bump causing Chew's head to lift momentarily off the glass only to smack back onto it inflicting no small amount of pain on Chew, but more importantly, jerk him back awake. Every single "Bumnk" only served to increase the swelling on the side of his head and to fuel the flames of his furnace of anger.

Things were only getting worse. "Bumnk!" As the journey to school dragged on, more and more people boarded the bus, every single one of them purposefully taking up more space in the vehicle and selfishly sucking in the oxygen and inconsiderately breathing out even more carbon dioxide, emitting great amounts of body heat in a conspiracy to turn the bus "Bumnk! bumnk!" that Chew sat in into a suffocating metal can wrapped in red and white wrappings, stuffed to the brim with sardine like people, placed on a heating stove for Chew to slowly melt and sweat and ... not... SLEEP.

Just then, the bus made a turn.. throwing the morning sunlight through the window and smack onto Chew's face. That bastard bus driver! He made that turn on purpose! Chew could almost hear his laughter coming from the front. "Bumnk!"

At long last, the stupid bus came to stop at the city hub where many sardines alighted to switch cans or to stick around and work in one of the large multi-level cans. Chew felt relieved and made a silent promise never to enter the corporate world where dogs ate other dogs and sardine men were swallowed whole. With the bus nearly empty, Chew's primal instinct to sleep kicked back in and slowly he drifted back to dreamland. "Bumnk!" Failure, attempting to re-enter dreamland.

He felt someone sat down beside him and that really pushed him over the edge. There were a million, no gazillion, OTHER seats to take. Those OTHER seats were looking to be sat on. Their purpose in life was to BE sat on. If she sat down on this already occupied seat, the other seats would be horribly jealous. They'd probably commit suicide, they'd probably start eating their our sponge, and why? All because this joker chose to seat on an already occupied space.

He blinked his eyes open and glanced to the side to look at the number one instigator of seat suicides. And there she was, seating right beside him, no longer nameless, beautiful semi-stranger, Ha. (But of course, this story is nonetheless the story of Ha and Chew, not just Chew)

"Good morning sleepyhead!" she beamed at him. Ha had her hair tied back today with only a few wisps of hair carelessly falling down onto her face and while she looked somewhat different from usual, Ha was not in any way less pleasing to the eye. If anything it only made her features more striking, more demanding of attention, ever the more alluring. Her eyes sparkled while she held her smile and Chew found himself staring into her eyes, no, past her eyes; as if deep into her soul.

Breaking off eye contact, Chew cast his eyes downwards and rubbed the back of his head while replying sheepishly, "No," pausing a moment before he carried on, "I was only resting my eyes, that's all."

Ha gave a laugh of amusement that sent a tingle of pleasure down his spine. Then unexpectedly she leaned forward placing her face uncomfortably close to Chew's. Sensing his visible distress at the proximity of him and herself, Ha's smile grew to a grin as if relishing in his discomfort then spoke after her inspection of Chew reddening face, "Well, it sure doesn't seem like it to me. I still think you were sleeping."

'Bumnk!' "Ouch!" "Owww!"

The bus sped over a particularly deadly hump jostling its passengers and causing a particular pair to bump foreheads. Ha winced in pain as she felt her forehead then spied at a glance at Chew then burst out giggling.

Rubbing his forehead gingerly while chasing away the yellow birds encircling his head, Chew asked defensively thinking he was being mocked at, "What are you laughing at?"

"No no! Don't get the wrong idea.. Heehee.. it just seems we're always knocking into each other, and in more ways than one," Ha pointed out with a disarming grin on her face and in short order, Chew started giggling along with Ha.

"We do, don't we?" nodded Chew in agreement still chuckling in uncontrollable bursts till finally their mirth had finally died down. He then sneaked a peek at Ha admiring her creamy white complexion and she was really quite the sight what with her cheeks flushed from the laughter making her look positively radiant. Furthermore, her ever present smile caused Ha's dimples to become an almost permanant fixture on her face. Chew could observe the details at this distance and he could even see her long curvacious lashes fluttering whilst she blinked away her tears.

Casually Ha tucked away the stray hairs that fallen out of place behind her ears then suddenly announced, "I'll have you know, I am terribly dissatisfied with you. Do you know why?" expecting no reply from Chew, Ha then continued, "You know my name and I know not of yours. Being that I offered my name to you, the very least you could do as a gentlemen was to offer you name back in kind."

Chew excitedly opened his mouth to speak his name even before his brain could muster up the words from his messy and disorganised mind leaving him sitting there with his mouth open for a few seconds before he actually started to talk. But as the words were about to leave his mouth, Ha placed her finger over his lips to silence him. "I have to alight soon. Here is my number," she said handing him a slip of paper, "give me a call tonight and tell me then. I believe you know who to ask for."

She then stood up and started for the exit, as the bus came to a halt, she looked back at Chew and smiled for a second before getting off. Savouring the slight scent left behind after her departure, he suddenly remembered the object that he had tightly grasped in his hand. Looking down at the slip of paper in his hand, Chew smiled happily and then in horror as he realised something terrible. He doesn't have a phone!


Vincent has left the building! [4:12 PM]
Food is a many splendid thing, food lift us up where we belong... All u need is food!

***

Sunday, June 20, 2004

Love, citizenship and holidays

There will come a time where you are in a relationship, and you are tempted to... how should I say, get into another, less serious but hopefully just as sexually intimate relationship. Obviously many people think its wrong, you noe, flings and such. The "cheating" party is deemed to be an arsehole, unfaithful and many other very negative connotations. But i ask u now, is it really as bad as you perceive? Flings are good. desireable. everybody wants them.

you see. being in a relationship is like being a citizen of Singapore. you get your fair share of perks, responsibilities and obviously plenty of shit. there are a millions things u dun like about the country and the government. but still you are a citizen of singapore cuz deep down inside you LOVE singapore.

but u see. just becuz i love singapore, it dun mean i can visit other countries. go on holiday! behind Singapore's back of cuz. it doesnt mean i dun love singapore anymore. i still want to be a citizen of singapore. im just going on a 7day 6night holiday. aint nothing wrong with that! you go there, enjoy the scenery, taste the exotic food. something new something different. you dun wanan be the guy who's never visited any other place. born in singapore. stays in singapore. never left singapore? no one wants to be that.

also... if you've never left singapore, how do u noe u love singapore that much?? i'll give u that, singapore is hot.. wet.. with a fast pace of life that'll leave u hot, bothered, sweaty and breathless from exhertion. but wat if thats not wat u want. maybe u like a slower type. like laid back new zealand with milk cows n stuff. maybe you're a germany guy or a russia guy. you'll never noe unless you've tried right? and in the end, after all the holidays, if u still come back to singapore, its like you still love singapore despite having tried all the other stuff. after everything, watching the scenery, tasting the food, you prefer singapore. and u can be sure u wana be a singapore citizen without any lingering doubts. now itsnt that better for everyone??

so i think, its time for us to not condemn fling takers. lets not call them cheating bastards and unfaithful whores. instead, let them be known as people taking the pilgrimage of confirmation. pilgrims who sleep around to be sure that the one they are currently with, is the one who they really want to be with. lets congratulate them and be envious of them just like when we find out that our frens r going on holiday. "you're going out with two girls?? GOOD FOR U! have fun! hope u still pick singapore n not migrate!"

(oh and btw, zi.. i wun be taking the pilgrimage. erm... i enjoy not knowing for sure if i wanna be a singapore citizen. the unknown is mysterious and intriguing to me. plus i cant afford to go on holiday =])

Vincent has left the building! [8:14 PM]
Food is a many splendid thing, food lift us up where we belong... All u need is food!

***

Sunday, June 13, 2004

The Story of Ha and Chew

Chapter 5

"That's it. Today's gonna be the day that I do it. No doubt about it. Yeah! I've got myself all psyched for it. This time I'm doing it for real! Uh huh...." For the 3rd time that week and the 15th time that month, Chew battled with himself to muster enough courage to speak to beautiful nameless stranger. The sun was already kissing the horizon casting a dizzying blend of purple orange and red across the sky indicating that in a few hours, the now vibrant sky would soon turn dark and be replaced by stars that would look like carelessly scattered diamonds upon the dark carpet of the heavens.

Life fell into a sort of pattern for Chew, if that is what you can call it. Chew had found out that beautiful nameless stranger was in the track team and that she often trained till late before heading home. And when beautiful nameless stranger trained, Chew would watch her from the grandstand, very much enraptured by her. He would watch; watch as the wind caressed her hair tantalizingly, as her cheek flushed pink from exertion and when she was done, he would put in spectacular effort to bring himself forward to engage her in idle conversation. But till today, his attempts have come up short and Chew is still no where closer to beautiful nameless stranger than he had been when he knocked her down the stairs.

As he paced back and forth the same spot in what looked like an attempt of genocide on the grass beneath his feet, Chew, the Hitler of the fauna world and nemesis to trampled vegetation campus wide, was unaware of the approaching figure coming up from behind him. He spun around with a start when he felt a tap on his shoulder and shocked was he to see that beautiful nameless stranger was standing right before him. What greeted his eyes nearly knocked him out; beautiful nameless stranger, all drenched in sweat from the run, looked positively alluring what with her wet T-shirt clinging onto her bodice akin to a second, all be it much more purple, skin. What her clothes suggested left little to Chew's imagination, which was not very much to begin with, and for the first time seeing her up close, Chew's came to appreciate her lean and well toned body.

"And what, might I ask, are you doing here?" questioned Ha with arms crossed beneath her breast and a single foot tapping in impatience but all Chew could do was to continually close his gaping mouth whose jaw kept falling slack back open. Sensing no reply from the human goldfish in front of her, Ha continued to speak, "Do not think for a moment that I've not noticed you these past few weeks. What do you think you're doing? Are you stalking me? Leave me alone, or do you plan to trip me over whilst I run? You little psycho you. I have no idea what perverse fetish you have with making people fall down the stairs or falling down the stairs yourself but I'll have you know right here right now that I'll have no part of your weird sexual games. For the last time leave me alone, I personally enjoy NOT falling down."

Satisfied that she'd finished what she wanted to say, Ha turned and started back towards the track. And as quickly as he fell into it, Chew snapped out of his hypnotic goldfish trance. Surely his situation with beautiful nameless stranger could not get any worse. He had to clear things up, and fast! Put into motion by the frightful prospect of never seeing her again, Chew finally mustered the courage to do what he had planned to do for half a year now. Defying all laws governing the logic of Chew, Chew ran after Ha catching up with her just at the edge of the track and shouted after her, "Wait! I can explain!"

Abruptly she stopped, swung around and looked at Chew eye to nose, adjusted the angle by tilting her head upwards and made eye contact with Chew and spoke with an icy cold countenance, "Don't bother." [Though part of that icy cold came from the up close and personal view of Chew's nose hair. He only dug for gold on the second Tuesdays of the month and should his nose get blocked before that time came, well he would just breathe through his mouth and not smell anything for that duration either.] And with that she made her 3rd 180 degree turn that evening and took the step onto the track. However it would be the third turn that would prove to be the most precarious.

Chew saw in slow motion as she spun around, took her first step out and tilt her head left. Observed how a streak of blue suddenly reduced velocity locking into the image of two human skulls smashing into each other. His mouth shaped into an "O" as he caught a glimpse of the runners leg catching onto Ha's extended foot launching him into the air. Then his eyes slowly widened till they were the size of saucers when he saw how Ha suspended in mid air as her legs were throw up by the impact and then suddenly and almost simultaneously, Ha and the runner both landed back on the track concluding with Chew now being the sole witness of this brutal woman-man collision.

Immediately rendered unconscious by the trauma dealt to the head in the impact, Ha laid, still and very silently on the ground in front of Chew.

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When Ha woke up, everything seemed very.. fuzzy. "What time is it?" She ventured groggily.

"9pm, you've been out close to 3 hours," came the reply.

She slowly opened her eyes and was surprised to see Chew. "You've been with me all this time? Where am I?!" she shouted suddenly alarmed and looking under the covers to see if she was still dressed. She gave a sigh of relief that she was still in her dirty purple T-shirt.

"You're in the campus medical center. I brought you here after you fainted. Don't worry... I didn't do anything. I'll go get the nurse," came the sharp reply from Chew obviously stung by the insinuation that his integrity was doubtful. Chew guarded his integrity murderously, for he and Kien had precious little of that commodity, at least in the eyes of others for they were the resident dimwit duo of the campus.

Sensing the resentment and obviously ashamed of what she had done, though she could never have known how much slight she had just inflicted on Chew, Ha quickly spoke, "No, I... didn't mean it that way.. sorta I guess. I guess, I owe you an apology as well as my thanks for bringing me here. You didn't have to stay here to watch over me but you did... Thank you."

With his back still facing Ha, suddenly overcome by anxiety Chew began to stammer his reply, "I... erm... too have to ap-apologise to to to you. I mean for knocking you up, I MEAN, ahh-- for ar knocking you down the stairs that -- that is that time.. SORRY!" He finished a little too loudly, "I'll get the nurse!"

"My name is Ha!" yelled the patient after the running figure with a small smile on her face. Giggling to herself she spoke softly enough only for her to hear, "Hmm he has a cute butt.. heehee."

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A janitor would find a runner in blue sleeping on the track the next morning.

Vincent has left the building! [9:18 PM]
Food is a many splendid thing, food lift us up where we belong... All u need is food!

***